That is how life is feeling at the moment. I'm 10 weeks in and absolutely terrified of this little person growing inside of me.
I can't shake it. I've been diving in prayer, but the fear still lingers.
No car space.
Not the doctor I wanted.
Not the town I want to be in.
No room in the house.
Not very many excited family members.
I'm having trouble functioning day in and day out due to the lack of food, and the crazy fatigue I can't shake. Not being able to stand up for more than 3 minuets sucks.
There's no plan.
I can't handle not having a plan. This is wear my fear comes from. I have to have a plan for everything. I MUST know what is happening next.
I put down books for weeks if they become too intense. But this isn't something I can walk away from-obviously.
Don't get me wrong, I am extremely excited by this baby-I know that it is truly a gift. But the fear is what keeps me up at night, and the first thing I think of when I wake up.
It's all happening so fast. 30 will go by even faster.
I just don't feel prepared for this.